I know that many people think that once they have kids their music festival days are behind them. Well, we have just spent a weekend at Lovebox proving that theory wrong. While music festivals are not to everyone’s taste, having children along for the ride is no reason to give up on going if you are a festival fan. Here are some tips if you are considering going.
Some reasons a music festival might not be best for you and your tribe
Your kids have never been to a non ‘child-centric’ public event before
If the only public gathering your kids have been to so far are of the teddy-bear’s picnic in the park for under-fives, a music festival is probably not the best place to introduce them to the world where everything is not catering to them. While some music festivals have kids specific activities (like Glastonbury), most are like Lovebox in that you are welcome to bring your kids, but be aware they are not going to be catered for. The thing is, most large music festivals not specifically targeted at families are about listening to music, and a close second for most people is drinking/dancing/hanging loose. We had a great experience at Lovebox, and received a lot of positive comments about Willem’s behaviour from people, but most people there couldn’t give a flying fruitbat about kids, and there were some negative comments by people who thought I couldn’t hear (they were drunk after all). In summary – if you are used to going places that will be child-centric, or where people will coo over your kids, don’t bother with a mainstream festival. People won’t care about creating a kid-suitable environment. And why should they?
You can’t handle your child being exposed to cigarette smoke/people who have been drinking/swearing
For many people, festivals are as much about alcohol consumption as it is about the music. While Lovebox was actually very chilled and we saw no real aggresive behaviour, there was an immense amount of drinking going on. Ditto smoking: the ‘smoking’s not cool’ message has not gotten through to British music fans. And swearing – it happens in the crowd, and happens a lot on the stage. Either deal with it or ignore it. Oh, and there will be drugs around. Again, music festivals seem to be more of the mellow, not obvious if you don’t know what you are looking at drug taking variety, but if your kids are slightly older they will probably notice that the cigarettes being smoked are not always of the ‘regular’ variety. Your call.
Crowds and your kids are a mix that freaks you out
If this picture stresses you, the main stage at a music festival may not be for you
Big festivals mean big crowds. Really big crowds. I mention below a few pointers for dealing with it, but if you get anxious about looking out for your kids when crowds are around, a big music festival, or at the very least the main stages, are not for you. The main stage crowd at a big festival can number in the tens of thousands. Trust me, that is a lot of people.
So if I haven’t scared you off, here are a few pointers for enjoying a music festival with kids in tow:
Plan. Plan. Plan.
I am guilty of not doing this so well this year. If I had planned properly we would have at the very least have brought a picnic blanket. But think – what do you need? At the very least, have fluids in sealed bottles (glass will be confiscated. Ditto cans. Some festivals will only allow in sealed bottles, so they can tell you are not bringing in alcohol). Consider bringing in something to keep bored kids from whinging too much (in our case, some Horrible History books for Willem to read during sets he didn’t like so much). Quite a few parents are starting to use ear-muffs designed for babies at festivals. Peltor seems to be the most used brand.
Read the website
It was amazing to see the amount of people getting annoyed at the security check when they couldn’t bring in alcohol or glass bottles. It’s on the website people – don’t bring it. (That said, the website said you couldn’t bring your own food, but people got in with it. We wised up and brought our own stuff on Sunday). But check the website regularly, as things change, FAQs are usually pretty good, and there might be competitions or deals announced at the last minute.
Make sure your kids know what to do if you are separated
As with any situation, make sure you have a ‘if you get lost’ plan that not only includes where to meet up, but also who to ask for help and exactly what to do. And drum it in to your kids until it is second nature. For Lovebox, Willem wore his Road ID wristband at all times. As well, we continually reminded him that if he got lost, he should grab one of the people in the high-vis vests and tell them that his parents would meet him at a certain place if we were separated. It’s up to you to judge, but I find that kids up to quite a late age can’t be relied to just find the meeting point on their own if they get lost, they need a responsible adult to walk them there.
Be prepared for the toilets
Lines to the toilets - even longer than the lines at the bar
Festival toilets are always horrid. The lines are long, the paper runs out early, and the smell is stomach churning. Be prepared. Let your kids know ahead of time that you will be taking them regularly, regardless of whether they feel the need to go or not. And then be prepared for them saying that they HAVE TO GO right in the middle of a set by your favourite artist. Trust us on that one.
Dress for comfort
Festival season is such an institution in Britain that most people know what they are doing now. Number one rule – comfy shoes. It was reassuring to see the very low number of people wearing ridiculous heels at Lovebox (and most of them were men. No really.) Whatever you are wearing, make sure that it is comfortable, you don’t care if it gets wrecked, and that it can handle dust and mud. It is an institution in the UK that if there is the slightest chance of mud you will wear wellies (gumboots) to the festival, the fanicer the better (depsite Lovebox being bone dry there were a few people walking about in their ‘festival wellies’). Bottom line – you will not be the most stylish person there. Nor will you be the least stylish. Trust me. Make sure you and the kids are comfy, and pack a spare change of clothes for them. And hats. And sunscreen.
Prepare to dig in for the long run
Best place, at least at a main stage? Against the barrier at the back near the sound deck/cameras/lighting team. Works for us: a bit of space, and at a good venue little people can see the stage when lifted up* and the big screens, the music is not too loud but the big bass tunes will still make your body vibrate, and kids can sit down if need be. But securing such a place means you might have to get there relatively early and stay there. If your kids are younger than teenagers, you don’t want to be in the middle of a big crowd. No really, you don’t.
Have fun …
It's not all about the music you know ...
Seriously, that is why you are there, right? Sure you have paid a fortune, and are trying hard to co-ordinate seeing the various bands you want to see that seem to be spread over different venues, but don’t lose sight of the reason you are there.
… but be prepared to cut your losses
It might not work. The kids are hating it, the band you thought would rock actually suck (looking at you Roxy Music), it’s just not working. Be prepared to head back to your tent, or hotel or home. Or at the very least check out a different stage and give up that prime spot near the main stage.
Don’t go solo
When I first booked the tickets to Lovebox, I thought my husband would be away so just booked my ticket (Willem was free). Luckily it turned out that the father of the household would be around AND I got last minute tickets for him. Thank all that is holy is all I can say. Not only did we get a great family weekend out, but I can’t imagine having to do it on my own. At the very least, it meant someone could stay and look after things while the other took Willem on the inevitable toilet break. It also means added support, sharing food/drink runs and generally sharing making sure a smaller person is coping with the whole festival experience. If you are a single parent who wants to go to a music festival with your kids, seriously consider bringing an adult friend along, for your sanity’s sake if nothing else.
If Grace Jones is part of the line up, do anything you can to see her
Seriously, best. live. act. ever.
Music festivals rock**. And having kids is no reason not to go. Just remember that some kids can cope, some can’t. And trying to shoe-horn your kids into an event that you really know they won’t cope with is just asking for trouble. But allowing your kids to do something a bit different can be an awesome experience they, and you, will probably remember forever. And who knows – they might even thank you for it one day!
* Big props to the security staff and sound tech guys at Lovebox. Saturday night we asked if Willem could stand on the step-thingie on the back of the barriers behind us (standing at the back of the crowd) and we were warily told next. He could see the stage, a little, and clearly see the big screens. Sunday night the same security team were around and said yes since things went well the night before. Never be afraid to ask, be prepared to hear no, and you might be pleasantly surprised with a yes.
** Sorry, couldn’t pass up the pun 🙂
Let's do something different 